Dear Reader,
As
a writer and literature enthusiast, I get to take a pretty in depth look at
archetypal characters. Unlike people in real life, these characters are each
very extremely one thing. Take for example the Trickster. The Trickster is a
character who crosses all of the boundaries that other characters are unwilling
to cross, often causing trouble along the way. He is funny and mischievous. He
breaks societal rules and redefines life on his own terms. Then there is the
Hero. The Hero is always brave and self-sacrificing. He believes in the greater
good and is willing to put every selfish inclination on the line for the
betterment of others. He is good and kind and has the ability to make things
better. But people in real life are not all one way, no matter how much they
may seem to be.
Today is a special day because it is the anniversary of the day I became
a big sister for the first time. My brother is on the surface a pretty a funny
guy. He is the Trickster. He gets
himself into trouble by pushing the boundaries. He says things that are over
the top. He does things that are over the line. And he is constantly living his
life by the definitions that work best for him. Sometimes being the Trickster
makes my brother gain enemies, but it much more often brings him great friends.
People like to be around him. Maybe they love the chaos. Maybe they just like
to laugh. But I think they can sense that here is more to him than just that
one archetype.
My brother is also the Hero. This is a part of him that sometimes he
forgets he has. When he was little he was always the first to come to my
defense. I was bullied in school. Even thought the kids who teased me were much
bigger and older than him, he didn’t let fear stop him from coming to my
rescue. He is a strong believer in justice. Seeing injustice gives him a
righteous fury that can be frightening if you’re on the wrong side of it. No
one would deny that my brother is brave and bold like a hero, but sometimes it
takes getting through the layer of Trickster to see his love a goodness and
justice. I think he may sometimes believe that the Hero is something just from
his past but it is still very much a part of him.
Shortly before I left Vegas for Germany I had a conversation with him that I haven’t been able to get out of my head. We were driving home from the place that we used to work together in his truck and he expressed to me that he admired my ability to travel. He loves home. He’s comfortable at home and he’s sometimes afraid to go other places because he has to leave that comfort. I am not comfortable when I am at home too much. I need to travel. I need adventure to feel comfortable and sure it can be a bit scary to travel but the idea of staying in Vegas forever is way more terrifying to me. I am a bird aching to fly and never turn back and he is a bird who is afraid to ever leave the nest.
I think one of the reasons that
this conversation meant so much to me wasn’t because of the differences between
my brother and me. It was because I realized in that moment how much we need
each other and how much we have to learn from each other. How perfect is it
that I am his older sister who can set the example of leaving the nest and can
show him how to fly safely. And how perfect is it that he wants to stay so that
I always have a reason to return to the nest and won’t forget where I came
from.
Essentially my brother and I make a
great team. In the ways that I am weak he always makes up. He is so smart and
learning comes easy to him. He excelled in school and hardly had to try. I love
to learn but struggled with school. I was smart too but academics didn’t always
come easily to me like they did to him.
Sometimes I have a hard time
remembering to be happy and enjoy life. He makes me laugh and reminds me that
even when things suck that won’t last. When I’m feeling down about my own
trials and wanting to give up I look to him. He is above me, still climbing on
the side of a steep mountain and he doesn’t have to tell me that I can do it, he doesn't even have to know that I'm climbing too, because I can see through his strength that any mountain can be climbed and that example of strength and courage is all that I need.
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| The Queen of Clean, The Hero, and The Wanderess at The Hero's Graduation |
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| The Trickster and The Wanderess laughing |
Austin, when I see you fight towards the top of the mountain you inspire me to do the same and you are my salvation. I hope that in some way, though comparably insignificant, I can do the same for you by continuing to pave a safe path around the world that you can follow as soon as you are ready to fly. I love you Austin. Happy birthday bro!
Love Always,
The Wanderess
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